{"id":4251,"date":"2022-09-18T22:43:40","date_gmt":"2022-09-18T17:13:40","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.amitacare.com\/?p=4251"},"modified":"2024-06-14T21:33:00","modified_gmt":"2024-06-14T16:03:00","slug":"not-to-let-the-tainted-tears-drop-and-wane","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/amitacare.com\/index.php\/2022\/09\/18\/not-to-let-the-tainted-tears-drop-and-wane\/","title":{"rendered":"Not to let the tainted tears drop and wane"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>My father used to read me a story before bed every night. My day&#8217;s most eagerly anticipated moment was then. Not just the stories, but also his time and affection, in<br>my opinion. He used to have a girl who battled against the odds as the protagonist of his stories. Every conceivable issue has a solution, my brain has been sort of learning, and I truly lived by it. I&#8217;m here writing this blog because of that. I spent my entire life working for this job, and now I&#8217;m outside this massive structure staring at it with the same sense of achievement that a hiker has while looking at the mountains. I wasn&#8217;t sure how to deal with the feelings in my thoughts at this time,<br>because coming from such a humble family It was more than a dream come true to work in one of the biggest companies in the world. After gathering myself, I entered<br>the building with a strong desire to succeed and provide for my family. As precious as this moment felt to you at the time and as a significant turning point in your life, who knew it would bring me down this road?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I was a member of the sales team, and while I was bringing in business, I wasn&#8217;t<br>quite as effective as some of the people who had been in this industry for the<br>previous 20 years. I imagined that ultimately if they got to know me, they&#8217;d embrace<br>me once they saw that their skepticism was only a result of the fact that I came from<br>a totally different culture. All the other people in my time made jokes about me<br>behind my back and isolated me. All of their bad behavior was becoming worse, but I<br>just ignored it and concentrated on my job since I didn&#8217;t want to bother anyone, or<br>perhaps I believed it was not important enough to raise a fuss over. I was quite<br>simple and only looking forward to the break I was about to get soon.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\u201cSir is calling you in his office,\u201d; umm yes, I\u2019ll be there. He doesn&#8217;t typically call me in<br>his office on a meeting day, so I was a little concerned. In an effort to stop my mind<br>from racing with all the potential disasters, I enter the room and study his<br>expressions. As he continues, I feel a little bit more at ease because he mentions a<br>client who hasn&#8217;t been placing orders but is crucial to the business and he&nbsp;wanted<br>me&nbsp;to deal with it&nbsp;rather than someone else on my team whom I didn&#8217;t know. I didn&#8217;t<br>consider the repercussions since I was so excited about the chance and the fact that<br>he believed in me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I put a lot of effort into getting the order, and I was ultimately successful. When one<br>of my co-workers said, &#8220;She could only get the order because she seduced the client<br>in doing so,&#8221; I was about to give my boss the report and the credit time papers in the<br>meeting. I was shocked to hear what he said and furious, but I patiently waited for<br>my boss to take the initiative and speak on my behalf. Instead of stopping them or<br>making any other show of respect to me, he remarked that we&#8217;ll talk about this later. I<br>realized at this point that I was not safe and that the situation was not what I had<br>assumed it to be.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Until I realized my mistake, life kept dragging me deeper and deeper into this<br>morass. I was afraid after that encounter, which is unusual for me because I don&#8217;t<br>typically take any action, but then several weird men started contacting me and asking if I wanted to have sex with them. I had to file legal charges against these<br>individuals because they had gone&nbsp;over the line. I learnt my lesson the hard way<br>and felt I should share it with you so that you may stand up to injustice as soon as it<br>arises rather than waiting for it to worsen. Following that, I sought counseling, and<br>this is what I learnt that enabled me to find closure.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Abrasiveness or bullying happens for two reasons. First, bullying individuals are low<br>in social&nbsp;and emotional intelligence.&nbsp;They have no idea of the damaging impact of<br>their behavior.&nbsp;They don&#8217;t understand why even if they&#8217;ve been told many times<br>they need to change. &nbsp;Second, bullying individuals are driven by the desire&nbsp;to be<br>seen as uber, uber competent.&nbsp;Somewhere along the line, they&#8217;ve come to<br>think&nbsp;acting this way is assisting in that endeavor.&nbsp;And if they perceive others as<br>incompetent,&nbsp;it makes them nervous.&nbsp;They get anxious about their own ability to<br>appear competent&nbsp;if they have alleged incompetence around them,&nbsp;and they lash<br>out.&nbsp;They have the ability to process information&nbsp;much more quickly than most<br>people,&nbsp;so they get frustrated when others can&#8217;t keep up.&nbsp;This is incompetence in<br>their minds,&nbsp;and they believe it slows them down.&nbsp;Beyond those two main<br>reasons,&nbsp;people also bully because they&#8217;ve learned it from somewhere,&nbsp;whether as a<br>child or from a previous manager.&nbsp;The organization also facilitates bullying.&nbsp;Most<br>bullies have commonalities in behavior,&nbsp;such as disorganized structure or unclear<br>goals,&nbsp;high competition, aggressive leaders,&nbsp;or lack of HR support in addressing<br>employee performance.&nbsp;The organization can also facilitate bullying&nbsp;by rewarding top<br>producers, which bullies usually are,&nbsp;or having a leader who just tolerates the<br>behavior.&nbsp;So, is bullying intentional?&nbsp;No.&nbsp;These people aren&#8217;t getting up in the<br>morning&nbsp;excited to make people cry.&nbsp;They get up in the morning intending to get the<br>job done,&nbsp;and they&#8217;ll stop at nothing to ensure it does.&nbsp;But that&#8217;s why the organization<br>needs to step in.&nbsp;If you can help them, see that their behavior&nbsp;actually makes them<br>look super incompetent,&nbsp;they will change.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>At the workplace, adequate attention has not been paid to the settlement of the<br>grievances. The legislative framework deals only indirectly with the redressal of<br>individual grievances and enhancing the awareness of sexual harassment. Bringing<br>in concerted voices that have witnessed harassment at workplace can bring in more<br>visibility and action.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><br><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>My father used to read me a story before bed every night. My day&#8217;s most eagerly anticipated moment was then. Not just the stories, but also his time and affection, &hellip;<\/p>\n<p class=\"read-more\"> <a class=\"\" href=\"https:\/\/amitacare.com\/index.php\/2022\/09\/18\/not-to-let-the-tainted-tears-drop-and-wane\/\"> <span class=\"screen-reader-text\">Not to let the tainted tears drop and wane<\/span> Read More &raquo;<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_mi_skip_tracking":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4251","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"aioseo_notices":[],"featured_image_urls":{"full":"","thumbnail":"","medium":"","medium_large":"","large":"","1536x1536":"","2048x2048":""},"post_excerpt_stackable":"<p>My father used to read me a story before bed every night. My day&#8217;s most eagerly anticipated moment was then. Not just the stories, but also his time and affection, inmy opinion. He used to have a girl who battled against the odds as the protagonist of his stories. Every conceivable issue has a solution, my brain has been sort of learning, and I truly lived by it. I&#8217;m here writing this blog because of that. I spent my entire life working for this job, and now I&#8217;m outside this massive structure staring at it with the same sense of&hellip;<\/p>\n","category_list":"<a href=\"https:\/\/amitacare.com\/index.php\/category\/uncategorized\/\" rel=\"category tag\">Uncategorized<\/a>","author_info":{"name":"admin","url":"https:\/\/amitacare.com\/index.php\/author\/admin\/"},"comments_num":"0 comments","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/amitacare.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4251","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/amitacare.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/amitacare.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/amitacare.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/amitacare.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4251"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/amitacare.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4251\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4257,"href":"https:\/\/amitacare.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4251\/revisions\/4257"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/amitacare.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4251"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/amitacare.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4251"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/amitacare.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4251"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}